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We are complex beings, and conflict affects us on many levels. In order to be able to do this job, I explored and tried out different practices and rituals, and some have become now essential for life and work. I call this the 'Red-Blue-Purple Method'.

 

This is an ever-evolving method, that is personalized to one's changing needs. In principle, a regular practice of activities from each of these 3 areas will build a more balanced, resilient self. I have found immense benefit from this method.

It really helps.

Below is an example of how I work on myself, and how this affects my attitude towards conflict. I encourage you to find your own tools, and build a regular habit in attending to your self. It's only a person at peace who can bring peace to others.

A synthesis of

GROUNDING:
Body/ Breath

Yoga, Pranayama (breathing exercises), Pilates, strength training,

Activities in nature (walking, hiking, skiing, forest bathing)

Gardening (indoor and outdoor), Healing arts: handmade clay objects, sketching, Thai reflexology

SOOTHING:
Mind/ Intellect

Meditation,

Self-reflection, Journalling,

Reading, courses (I recommend 'Compassionate Inquiry' with Dr. Gabor Mate);

Non-violent communication (or NVC book/ articles/ groups), Jungian depth psychology (books/ articles); Listening to Vedanta philosophy podcasts.

INSPIRING:
Transcendent

Attending personal and group retreats (twice a year) and Silent retreats (at least once a year); spiritual practices (prayer, chanting), reading of spiritual literature (lives of saints and inspiring personalities like Gandhi, Mandela, Swami Sivananda), pilgrimages, visiting places of worship, volunteering.

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it"

Gandhi

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